Summer used to mean no school, no schedule, longer days. Playing outside, working outside, sneaking in a swim here and there. Generally living life! As I got older, the meaning changed a bit (mostly because the working world doesn’t care if we live or die, if we have time off and enjoy ourselves or not!) It also didn’t help that I moved to a hotter climate, where summers were less bearable than when I was younger. I slowly began to forget the joy and magic that was held between those sweet, long days of summer.
Over the past couple years, I’ve reached an age where now summers take on yet another meaning: wedding season. Every year, there seem to be more and more people I know taking the plunge, and I’m genuinely happy for them! Those who want to make the choice to be with their person, in whatever capacity they want is a beautiful thing.
This year my brother is getting married. He is the first in my immediate family to get married and as you can imagine, my parents are thrilled. Having been in several weddings myself, I was prepared for some of the feelings and obligations that come with being in a wedding. However, I wasn’t prepared for how much closer to home this one hit me.
I don’t live super close to my family of origin anymore, and the distance has always been manageable. It has allowed me a chance to grow and explore who I am as a person outside of the expectations I grew up with. And with all the travel options in todays world, as well as the technology, it has been fairly easy to stay in touch.
But weddings have a way of bringing out the craziness. It’s like they take all the stress and bad habits we have and turns them up to eleven. Everyone has a different level of comfort with details and information, how much they need, how much they want to be involved…and trying to juggle all those personalities and needs can be challenging.
As a recovering peace keeper / middle child, it has been especially challenging. Trying to hold on to who I am, who I have grown to be, and what my boundaries are amidst the pressure from those who have known me the longest. It has given me pause and reason to feel both extremely grateful for all the work I’ve done up til now, the fact that I’m not the one actually getting married, and also feeling extremely frustrated at times with the state of expectations and pressures being placed upon me (and those around me).
I suppose a marriage is not an event to be taken lightly. It is a real commitment and act of service to be there for another, so in that way it makes sense there would be so much pressure and feeling of all the feelings around a wedding. But sometimes I think we have lost sight of that side of a marriage.
Weddings in America on average these days cost $20,000-$30,000 for the day and venue alone. Family members on both sides want to celebrate, be seen, be heard, and everyone has an opinion. It can spiral quickly and at times it feels like no one is safe.
Astrologically, this wedding is coming at me during a time where I’m dealing with feelings of relationships of all sizes. 2024 has been full of transits, full moons and eclipses happening in my 4th and 7th houses (house of family and house of committed partnerships, respectively). This is where I find the tool of astrology extremely useful.
Having these feelings come up is one thing, but having a tool to look at and be able to go “ah, this makes sense. The energies of the universe are literally conspiring right now to push me to a greater awareness in this area” gives me a greater understanding. It allows me to not fall too deep into the pit of self pity or self hate, while already going through a difficult process.
We all have different areas of our lives that hit us and process at different times. Sure, some can look at it and say this is just chance. Using astrology gives us another perspective. I encourage you to not take my word for it! Think back on your life to a time where you were going through a big change. Whether that was struggling with your career, wanting to find more purpose in your work life, or starting to build a family and questioning what that may look like for you.
Chances are, if you look at that time and then look at your chart, the universe was conspiring to help you too! I don’t believe astrology is predictive of our lives in a way that is pre-destined. But I do believe the themes that come up in our lives come up at certain times in our lives for a reason, and the use of astrology helps us to feel less alone when they do. (Us humans love to feel like we are in control, even if it’s a false illusion!)
I’ll give you an example. Back in February, the new moon was in Aquarius, which for me is in the 4th house of family and parents. I was dealing with a lot of feelings around the wedding back in February, as they spoke to me about their expectations, getting involved, and who I was allowed (and not allowed) to bring as a date. It also brought up feelings internally about what I want my family life to look like going forward, how I fit in to this new shifting family.
Now that the wedding is almost here, the moon has shifted into Taurus, which is in my 7th house (the house of committed partnerships.) So I’m dealing with the feelings of my own personal relationships, my own feelings on weddings and marriage in general. What will my life look like, how do I want to continue forward?
I guess this is just a stream of consciousness to say, maybe we can be a little easier on each other. Maybe we can spread love more than stress, joy more than pushing our own agendas. Remembering that boundaries are OK and even good, and just because one comes up doesn’t need to be taken personally. And that maybe the tools around us can help us feel a bit more grounded, a bit less crazy, even in our craziest times!
Wishing you all a wonderful, contemplative few weeks! Love to hear your thoughts if you’d like to share in the comment section. And if you'd ever like a musical track to help you through some of the more intense feelings in your life, I’ve got your back.
In the meantime, I’ll be over here working on some new songs! I am now creating musical tracks for signs and planets with lyrics to further exemplify the emotions and feelings of the combination. So far I have Leo Sun in E and Cancer Moon in A. Curious to hear them? I’m so excited so share!
I read the subject line as Unicorns and What They Bring Up... wanted to share... as I had a good laugh after re-reading your email when it came in.